Friday, February 18, 2022

Where do the Sackler family live?

The gruesome faces of evil: Mortimer Sackler Jr., and his wife Jacqueline Sackler.  The 40 or so members of the Sackler family have been the chief beneficiaries of the opioid epidemic that has killed hundreds of thousands of people in the United States.  And a few of these Sacklers are surprisingly easy to find.

Saturday, February 5, 2022

They're Trying to Ban Books Again (as if they ever stopped)

Fahrenheit 451: Followers of Christian pastor Greg Locke toss books onto a bonfire in Nashville suburb Mt. Juliet, Tennessee, on February 2, 2022.  Books that burned included selections from the Harry Potter and Twilight series (these encourage devil-worship and witchcraftery), among many others.  One counter-protester tossed the Bible on there.  Greg Locke is also known for encouraging his followers to attend the January 6, 2021 Capitol riot.  

Friday, January 28, 2022

Whom The Gods Would Destroy...

DJ Ferguson is a 31-year-old Massachusetts man, a father of two children, with a third on the way.  He is in heart failure, and is being denied a heart transplant because of his refusal to get a Covid-19 vaccine.  There are only so many extra hearts floating around, and if you're vulnerable to infection from Covid, you're not a candidate to get one. 

Saturday, January 15, 2022

Whitey on the Moon

A tearful William Shatner (yes, of Captain Kirk fame) bleats on about something while vulture capitalist Jeff Bezos daydreams of tearing into Shatner's soft flesh.  On October 13, 2021, the 90-year-old Canadian actor rode on Bezos's Blue Origin flying machine to sub-orbital space.  Thus, Shatner became the oldest person to not quite do what Russian cosmonaut Yuri Gagarin first did more than 60 years earlier. 

Thursday, January 6, 2022

What is a Paradigm Shift and Why do We Need One?

Earthrise, a photograph taken from lunar orbit by the Apollo 8 astronaut William Anders, on December 24, 1968.  At the time, this pic was thought to have shown people the limits of growth.  Then everyone forgot.

Tuesday, July 20, 2021

Why Do Trump Supporters Desecrate the Flag?

This hideous piece of trash cheapens the symbol of America.  It is also against the law.  And yet, they keep doing it, over and over again.  Why?

Monday, July 5, 2021

When the Levee Breaks

Memphis Minnie and Kansas Joe McCoy
Memphis Minnie and Kansas Joe McCoy.  Memphis Minnie wrote the original version of "When the Levee Breaks," and recorded it in 1929 with her second husband and musical partner Kansas Joe.

Saturday, May 8, 2021

The Case Against Free Will

Albert Einstein blackboard
Albert Einstein, age 42.  Einstein may have been the smartest human who has ever lived.  To paraphrase No Country for Old Men: "If he ain't, he'll do til the smartest one gets here."  Einstein believed that we do not have free will.

Saturday, May 1, 2021

Oh, the Humanity - "Come and See" may be the best war movie of all time

Flyora Come and See gun to head
A Nazi storm trooper holds a gun to the head of the 13-year-old boy Flyora in Come and See, the most harrowing war movie you will ever see.  At the bottom of this post, you can watch it if you dare.

Thursday, April 15, 2021

The Curious Case of Khloe Kardashian

Khloe Kardashian is one of the world famous Kardashian sisters, who are wonderful influences on girls and women everywhere.  Khloe consistently chooses to present her appearance in the media as you see it above.  Interestingly, this is not what she looks like in real life.  And her fantasy was recently punctured by the release of an unauthorized photo.

Thursday, April 8, 2021

Enter the Cathedral

Calaveras Big Trees State Park
Giant sequoia trees at Calaveras Big Trees State Park in California.  We have a lot to learn, and trees can help us. 

Thursday, April 1, 2021

How to Read Paywalled News Sites for FREE

April 15, 1912 edition of The World newspaper.  Headline, "above the fold," as people used to say.  More than 1,500 people died in the Titanic disaster.  

Thursday, March 25, 2021

Moratorium on Mass Shootings Declared

We have another winner: 21-year-old Robert Aaron Long of Georgia is a young guy with a bad beard.  He shot and killed eight people at Atlanta area Asian massage parlors a little over a week ago, apparently because he is a "sex addict," and being a sex addict bothers him.  But he's not the only one who's been doing mass shootings these days.

Wednesday, March 17, 2021

Wednesday, March 10, 2021

I Shot Elephants in South Africa (with a camera)

Elephant in Kruger National Park
Elephant in Kruger National Park.  Southern African elephants are the largest land animals, and thought to be among the most intelligent animals, on Earth.  They face serious ongoing threats to their continued existence.  From us, naturally.

Tuesday, March 2, 2021

I'm Not Glad That Rush Limbaugh is Dead

Mug shot of Rush Limbaugh after a 2006 arrest for possession of more than 2,000 pills obtained under fake prescriptions.  Opiate addict, outrageous hypocrite, science-denier, racist, sexist, all around ignorant blowhard (and garish tie salesman), Limbaugh embodied many of the things that went wrong in the United States.  He was also one of the most popular radio hosts in American history.

Tuesday, February 16, 2021

There Is No Way Out

Christopher Thomas Knight, aka the North Pond Hermit, in custody of beefy Maine game wardens, April 2013.  Knight spend 27 years without human contact in the Maine woods.  But did he really?

Monday, February 8, 2021

Blood Pressure Too High? Drink Hibiscus Tea.

Unfortunately, you don't usually get this kind of early warning when you have high blood pressure.  But if you do, one way to beat it is by drinking hibiscus tea.     

Monday, February 1, 2021

Tom Brady Sleeps A LOT. Inside a Coffin. During the Daytime.

 
This week, the ageless wonder Tom Brady is back in the Super Bowl for what seems like the 57th time, and with a different team.  No one understands this.  Could it be his sleep habits?  

Wednesday, June 10, 2020

What's Wrong With Texas?

They be some COVID-19 cowboys in Texas.  Texans were early adopters of the Great Reopening of America, once again proving that big hats do not equal big brains.  If I were modeling these styles, I would look equally as sheepish as this man does.

Here's a hint: Texas is doomed.



Thursday, June 4, 2020

Lying Ass Motherfuckers

Unidentified old man lays on the ground and bleeds from the head in Buffalo after tough guy cops half his age pushed him down.

Wednesday, March 11, 2020

Trump and the "CoronaVirus"


No doubt about it, Donald Trump is the President of the United States.  He is therefore in charge of the Great American Coronavirus Response, ongoing now.

He is also an overlarge, orange manbaby.  He routinely demonstrates the attention span, self-absorption, and intellectual capacity of a four-year-old boy.

In the interest of science, Thee Optimist has hazarded a few guesses about what runs through that tiny little mind of his, when thinking about the worldwide pandemic currently threatening the world.










Yes, please do.  Feel free to leave your own clever captions in the comments section below.



Sunday, March 8, 2020

Why We Love Tattoos

Unless she's diabetic, the above sweet gal probably had a different kind of "pee" in mind for her tramp stamp.  But no matter.  Tattoos are meant to be fun.  

Tuesday, February 18, 2020

Coronavirus: Game Over?

Just a typical day in Wuhan, China.  Man relaxing in a local park, not a care in the world.  Little does he know that medical experts are actually worried this time.

Friday, February 7, 2020

Get Stoned and Make Barbie Porn


Lil McGill gets stoned and engages in some carpentry.  Barbie loves how her new Dream House comes out.

Tuesday, May 28, 2019

Tourist Trap

Hurry up and wait.  On May 22, 2019, dozens of people endure the hours-long line to reach the summit of Mount Everest.  Up here, in the so-called Death Zone, climbers are confronted by temperatures as low as 50 degrees below zero, high winds, and dangerously low levels of oxygen. 

Friday, May 24, 2019

You Are Made of Iron

When I was a young man, I worked briefly with the elvish Doug Osheroff, a Nobel Prize winning scientist who taught me something about myself that I didn't know.

Thursday, March 28, 2019

Are Seals Related To Dogs?

A wild seal dog.  Well, not really.  Just somebody's dog wrapped in a blanket like a burrito.

Thursday, March 21, 2019

Get Stoned and Make French Toast

French toast is delicious!  But it can take a while to make, especially when you get distracted by, uh... other things.  Watch video below.

Wednesday, March 13, 2019

Humans Will Be Obsolete Soon

Ray Kurzweil is among the smartest humans.  He takes great joy in making predictions.  The things he predicts appear to make him happy, but they are not good things.

Friday, March 1, 2019

The Insects Are Dying Off. It's About Time.

Wasp.  Ever get stung by one of these things?  I have.  Ouch!  Okay?  I thought I was having a heart attack.  I never want to be stung by a wasp again.  And since all the bugs are finally dying off, I just might get my wish. 

Tuesday, February 19, 2019

After All These Years, Alex Chiu is Still Immortal

Alex Chiu has been selling his magnetic immortality rings online since the early days of the internet. He's still at it, and is staying young forever. 
Alex Chiu is immortal unless he dies because of an accident or murder.  He sells immortality rings, which he claims on his website are the "most important invention in human history." 

Tuesday, February 12, 2019

Get Stoned and DO SOMETHING

Artists are forever seeking ways to unleash their creativity.  Altered states of consciousness are one way to do it.  And sometimes the results are better than expected!  

Sunday, February 10, 2019

Sunday, February 3, 2019

3 Infuriating Lies the President of the United States Told in 2018

Donald Trump as Pinocchio, the wooden puppet who dreams of becoming a real boy.  The Donald is wrestling with the the Truth, and the Truth is losing.

Thursday, January 31, 2019

With Role Models Like Geronimo and Crazy Horse...

Rod Coronado has spent six years in prison for his actions on behalf of animals.

Interview by Brian Whitney

Rod Coronado is one of the best-known eco-anarchists and environmental revolutionaries of our time.  A lot of us sit around talking about how much we care about the Earth and the animals.  Rod feels the same way, except he did shit about it that got him thrown in prison.

He is out now and working to protect animals in a more lawful way, but one that is hopefully no less effective.   

This interview first appeared in the book Subversive.

Friday, January 25, 2019

Mass Hysteria Is Fun

A young woman cries at a Beatles concert in 1965.  Hordes of weeping, screaming female fans were a prominent feature of the early Beatles years.  As they were during the early Frank Sinatra years two decades earlier.  And the early Elvis years.  And the early One Direction years.  And the early... you get the idea.

Wednesday, January 16, 2019

On the Streets, Serving the "Hardest to Serve."

For homeless outreach workers, hardcore alcoholics are some of the most difficult people to get off the streets.