Friday, January 17, 2014

Forget Netflix. How To Watch Nearly Any Movie For FREE

You and your best pal can watch nearly any movie, online, for free.  Here's how.

People who know me can tell you that I love to get free stuff.

It's probably a holdover from the days when I was young and had no money, and used to steal things a lot.  Bad habit, that.  It'll put you places where you would rather not be. 

You'll be relieved to know that I'm not poor anymore (or young), and haven't been for many years.  But I still love free stuff.  And one thing I love to do is get free movies on the internet.  Usually, I don't even watch them.  I give them to other people.

I learned to do this because, let's face it, the Netflix instant streaming service really kind of sucks.  Three-quarters of what you want to watch isn't even on there.  Also, if you're like me, you don't want to pay $9 a month for the privilege of finding out that the movie you want to watch isn't available.

Movies I've found online, in their entirety, for free, in the past couple months include: Bridesmaids, Michael Clayton, The Fantastic Mr. Fox, Dawn of the Dead (2004 remake), Waiting for Guffman, My Dinner With Andre, the first Hobbit movie, all three Lord of the Rings movies, Cloverfield, Wanderlust, and probably a dozen others.  There isn't a single movie that I tried to get that I couldn't find. 

Friends are often astounded at the movies I can get them online, and the speed at which I can do it.  Fast.  A couple of minutes, no more than that.  Bam.  Here's the link.  Watch to your heart's content.

Sound good? 

Now, naturally I'm making a few assumptions here.  One is that you have access to high speed internet, most likely at home.  And you're paying for that, so obviously this isn't entirely free (though I do know a way you can get the internet for nearly free, and maybe one day I'll do a blog post about that).

The other assumption is that you don't mind watching movies on your computer, or you have a nice big flat screen you can hook up to your computer.  I happen to have a laptop with a very large screen, which I'm happy with, though I have hooked it up to much larger flat screen TVs before.

The final assumption is that you recognize you can't watch movies that just came out in the theater, though in a handful of cases, you'll even be able to do that.  

Okay, you ready?  Let's watch some free movies.


Warning: Do This First

Before you even think about doing what I'm about to describe, first go to the AVG page and download their free anti-virus software.  AVG is the world's best free anti-virus software.  I used to pay for Norton, and the free AVG is as good as the Norton subscription service.

It'll take you five minutes to download and set up the software. 

Also, when you download the AVG free service, set it up to automatically run a scan on your computer at regular intervals.  Mine runs a full scan every Sunday night.

Here's the link to the AVG free software.  Just hit the big green Download Free Software button on the right to get going:

http://free.avg.com/us-en/homepage     


So why are we doing this first?

Well, because we're going to be cruising through that internet netherworld of bootlegged, copyright-violated material.  And some of the people in that world are unscrupulous, and might dangle a free movie in front of you so they can put a nasty little bug on your computer.

The AVG free anti-virus will stop them from doing this.  It'll tell you when you try to access a website that's dirty, and it'll outright block any attempts to introduce a virus into your computer.  The weekly scan will catch, quarantine, and remove anything that managed to sneak in, which isn't going to happen anyway.

So, no worries about viruses.

Please note that if you don't put anti-virus software on your computer, I can't be responsible for what happens.  Just do it.  Don't be lazy.  If you skip this step, you will fuck up a perfectly good machine.

Okay, here's the fun part.


Step 1 - Go to Google Videos        

Google has a page called Google Videos.

You can just click on that link, or you can go to the Google homepage and type in Google Videos.  Whatever you prefer.

Once upon a time, Google Videos was going to be Google's answer to Youtube.  Then they just decided to buy Youtube instead.  Now they own Youtube, but you can't really watch any decent Hollywood movies on Youtube.

What you can do is go to Google Videos, which still exists, but gets zero attention.  It's just sitting there, lonely and bereft.  And what it's doing is cataloging where all the movies are, in their entirety, free of charge.     

So are you there?  Okay, good.


Step 2 - Google your movie

Now type in (without the quotes): "Name of movie full movie"

Let's say you wanted to watch the epic shark film Jaws.  Awesome movie.  Get the radioactive popcorn out, because that one's a corker.

You would type the following into Google Videos (again, without the quotes): "Jaws full movie".  Then hit return.  That would bring you to THIS PAGE.  Now, there's a lot of crap on there.  Like Youtube will show you the full movie of Jaws 5, but you don't want Jaws 5.  You want Jaws.

And there it is, the second listing, on a site called Viooz.  Click that link, scroll down the tiniest amount, and there's your movie.  Click the triangular arrow on the shark's face, and you're good to go.  If you want to watch it big, click on the little full screen control on the bottom right of the screen, next to the volume control.

Enjoy.

You can do this over and over again, with just about any movie you want to watch.  I haven't looked for one yet that I couldn't find.  


One last note:  Sometimes, you will need to look around a little bit through the Google results to get the movie you want.  Usually, it's one of the first three listed.

Also, these bootleg sites make their living from pop-up ads.  You will get pop-ups.  It doesn't mean you got a virus.  Just close the ads.  Don't click on them, no matter what they say!  Once the movie starts, you won't get them anymore.       

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